Dutch Treat or Hoodwinked - part 2

Part 1 recap: "No, Dutch Treat means we each pay half, yours is $53.00." He repeated. I countered with the definition: one pays for their share of the meal. He wasn't buying it, pun intended.

I paid half of the bill because I was at a loss of how to handle the situation without a making a scene. We went our separate ways once outside the restaurant. There were no platitudes about our time together and I certainly didn’t suggest meeting again. Now, alone in my car, as I banged my head on the steering wheel, I thought of all the things I coulda/woulda/shoulda done. Like just walking out leaving him with the entire bill, running him over in the parking lot, backing into his car as I hollered - Dutch treat this! I drove home feeling like a real schmuck.

One year later…

“Hi, I’m Robert. Your profile is very interesting, would you like to meet for dinner?”

I knew immediately it was the same “Dutch Treat” Robert, from his picture and his profile, not to mention, my little notebook where I entered snippets on each of my dates.

“No, I don’t think we would be a match.”

“How do you know that without meeting me? Face to face is always better than instant messaging.”

“We have already met, and it didn’t go well.”

“It’s not possible that we’ve met. I would remember your face, you’re so pretty.”

“I can tell you where we met, Clyde’s at Tysons Corner.”

“No, I’ve never eaten at Clyde’s.”

“I can tell you what you ordered, a pre-dinner drink, the salmon special, wine, an after-dinner drink and cheesecake. I had one glass of wine with an appetizer. Anything sound familiar yet?”

“I’m sorry, but I think you are wrong. I’m sure we have never met.”

“Well, there is no question we have met. We discussed your childhood sailing in Martha’s Vineyard, your job renovating houses near Capitol Hill.”

“Again, I don’t mean to be rude, but I am absolutely positive we have never met.”

“I’m trying to be gracious, but you have pushed my limit. We disagreed about the bill. You declared it would be Dutch Treat, yet you insisted that meant we each pay half of the bill. The definition of Dutch Treat: one pays their share of the meal.”

“Wouldn’t you like to meet for dinner so we can discuss this further?”

🎶 Another one bites, another one bites, and another one bites the dust🎶

and…….mic drop 🎤

Readers, thank you for taking the time to post your comments. They were hilarious and I wish I had thought of them myself, twenty years ago. You all defended my position and I really appreciate your support. 🦕

I can’t wait to read your comments this week!